Dating the Shrink
by The Mourner's Mistress
Summary: "Let's make a deal. Yet only if you decide to return. For every question you answer honestly, I'll do the same. Honesty for honesty. Deal?"
1. Chapter 1 - The First Session

**Edward**

I looked over my notepad, trying to make sense of everything I wrote down of my session with Irina. Not that my handwriting was that horrible – although my mother certainly would claim it was – but the woman just kept rambling on, so I did my best to keep up with her. Let's also pretend the doodles I made had any significant psychological meaning. Right now I could use any patient I could get.

"Wait- You can't just walk in there." My head snapped up when I suddenly heard Kate's voice. Not hard to see why, since suddenly a young, brown-haired woman made her way into my office, regardless the pleas of my new secretary.

"Apparently I need a shrink," she simply announced, her brown eyes locked onto mine.

"Ehr. I-" I managed to get out, obviously being thrown off by her sudden entrance. The woman was out of her damn mind.

She simply raised her eyebrows at me. "You are a psychologist, right? Or did I just enter a random house again?" she asked. "Damn."

"I am." This was simply ridiculous.

"Good," she sat down and crossed her legs, "Do your shrinking."

"You really should make an appointment first," I inform her calmly, though she doesn't budge.

She smiled crookedly and nodded. "I know. I took your very empty waiting room as an invitation."

Auwtch. And unfortunately true. Having only graduated only a few months ago, I still had to make a name for myself. However that's beside the point. For all she knows I could have a ton of patients today. Who does she think she is?

I sighed. "You may not have an appointment, but you do plan on paying, right?" I asked her. I had to make sure. Who knows what's happening in her mind.

"Yes, sir," she nodded with a satisfied smile. She played me, she played me damn well, and she knew it.

I ripped off one of the pages of my notepad, only to make my way to the other leather chair and take a seat. For several minutes I asked her all different kinds of questions, but she never gave an answer exceeding two words – or sometimes didn't answer at all. It didn't make any sense. First she just barged in here, only to stay quiet afterwards.

"It's been over fifteen minutes. Isn't there anything you'd like to talk about?" I asked, while tapping my empty notepad with my pen.

Finally she again smiled, though I could see the sarcasm in her eyes. "There's lots of things I would enjoy talking about, such as: the weather, nice places to travel to and your surprisingly good decorating-skills." Suddenly she stood up and walked towards my diploma hanging on the wall. Can't deny I'm pretty damn proud of it.

"Are these things you would like to talk about?" she asked me, shortly glancing over her shoulder.

I couldn't help but softly chuckle. "If that's what you'd like," I calmly respond. At this point I'd do almost anything to make her talk to me, although I would… You know, prefer talking about her.

"You're a liar," she mumbled smiling. "I thought trust was of the essence in situations like these?"

Who's graduated as therapist here, her of me? "Yes," I replied with a smile. "My apologies."

"Tell me, dr. Cullen. How am I supposed to trust someone, who expects me to tell them so many personal things, without getting anything in return?"

I.. Well. God damn it. "Ehr," I mumbled.

"I thought so. You haven't been doing for very long, have you?"

Now she's mocking me too? "No, I have not. But I can assure I'm just as capable of helping you than as any of the others," I responded slightly frustrated. "Although most of my patients tell me what's bothering them to begin with and don't simply walk in and take a seat."

She laughed, surprising me – and it was a beautiful laugh at that. Finally she took a seat again. "Sorry," she said, and I believe her. "Don't feel too bad. I've had several shrinks in my lifetime and haven't seen any of them more than one time. Well, not willingly at least."

"May I ask why?" I asked honestly intrigued.

"You may ask anything you'd like, I just try not to promise answers of any kind," she stated smugly and looked at her watch. "I've been here long enough to inform my father that I gave it an honest try, so if you don't mind: I'll be going now."

She calmly stood up and put some money on the table, making her way to the door.

"Wait!" I yelled, without even realizing it.

Slowly she turned around. "Something wrong?" she asked completely unimpressed.

I didn't even realize I had said it. I just wanted to learn more about her, about this completely interesting, crazy woman. "I have an idea," I said, already regretting it.

"Let's make a deal," I said and obviously caught her attention, seeing her crooked smile appear once more. "Yet only if you decide to return."

"Hmn. What do you propose?" she asked cautiously, taking a few steps towards me.

"For every honest question you answer, I'll do the same. Honesty for honesty. Deal?" Bloody brilliant idea, Eddie. You just broke every important rule they ever taught you. Shit.

She smiled, giving it some thought. "And thus breaking my tradition of never visiting a therapist more than once?"

"Well, yeah. But I'm pretty awesome," I said as charming as possible.

She raised her eyebrow in an undeniably skeptical way, but I could see her trying to hide away a smile. "How do I know you're not lying?"

"Try me," I continued.

She looked around again, glancing around the entire room. "I don't believe you decorated this yourself. You don't really come across as an interior designer." Is that another insult? I'm not even sure anymore. "Who did?"

I let out a chuckle. "My mother and sister-in-law did."

The answer seemed to satisfy her.

"What's your name?" I asked in return. Question for a question, honesty for honesty.

She pondered for a while, leaving us both in silence.

"C'mon," I begged.

She rolled her eyes at me. "Bella Swan," she eventually admitted, giving me a strange feeling of joy. I did it. She answered. And even though I only knew her name, it was the best bloody moment of the day.

"So, miss Swan. Do we have deal?"

Again she laughed, turning around again. "I'll think about it," she sang. "Just remember I prefer not to make appointments."

"You'll be the only person whom I allow to barge in without an appointment," I pledge, crossing my heart. "Though it would be appreciated if you'd wait, when I'm in another session."

"Noted." And with that, she left the room.


	2. Chapter 2 - The Niece

**Bella**

"Eight. Nine. Ten. You better be hiding, munchkin."

I turned around from the corner I was put in and glanced across my living room, where I immediately saw two little feet sticking from under the curtain. I love my niece with all my heart, truly. But she really sucked at playing hide-and-seek. Of course, I wasn't going to tell her that. Even I am not that cruel.

"Oh, where could she be?" I asked overly dramatic while sneaking through the room. Immediately I heard her soft giggles, which always fill my heart. God, I love that sound.

For several minutes I kept putting up an act of not being able to find her, making her fill the room with soft laughs and whispers. "I'm here," my 4-year old niece sang, with quite possibly the cutest voice ever. Again, not that skilled at playing hide-and-seek, but I was hoping she would never learn.

Quietly I made my way to my reddish curtains and suddenly pulled them away, making the little girl with long, bronze curls give a little squeal and roar with laughter. She tried to get away from me and ran to the couch.

"Oh no. Come here, little shrimp," I said laughing, while I went in pursuit. Soon I snatched her from the ground and pinned her down on the couch, tickling her without any mercy. "Do you surrender?" I asked her, stopping the torture for merely a second.

"Never!" She has her aunt's stubbornness.

Just when I wanted to make her beautiful laugh appear once more, the doorbell rang and we both sat up. "Who could that be, miss Ellie?" I asked shocked. Though there wasn't any doubt in my mind it would be my lovely, little sister.

"Mommy!" She shrieked as I picked her up and made my way to the door.

Before I turned the handle, I turned to my niece again. "Just like we practiced, alright?" She replied with an enthusiastic nod.

The moment I opened the door, she spoke and shook her head. "We didn't have ice cream for lunch, mommy." I would also have to teach her how to lie.

"Good job," I whispered, making her giggle.

Renesmee simply chuckled and took over her little girl. "Of course you didn't, otherwise your auntie Belle would be in a whole lot of trouble," she said as she looked me in the eyes.

I innocently raised my hands. "You heard the kid. We'd never do that. Right, Ellie?"

"We didn't have ice cream for lunch," she simply repeated, just like we practiced – though this time she added the pout. I love that kid.

"Hm-hm," she snorted. "Did you have fun at aunt Bella's, sweetheart?"

She extensively nodded and started to explain with grand gestures. "We built a fort and made cookies and played outside and I got sprinkles on my ice cream!" She froze as Nessie gave her a strict look. "Uh-oh. Sorry, aunt Bella."

"Traitor," I whispered and planted a kiss on her curls. I loved that she always seemed to enjoy herself with me. She herself was one of the few human beings I myself liked spending time with. My sister was also one of them.

"That sounds like fun," Nessie replied with a wide grin. She's a natural mother, that one. Even though she panicked like crazy when she found out she was pregnant and it took us lots of girls-nights to get her to calm down. The moment she saw Ellie, she fell in love with her. It's crazy to see how she evolved from the rebellious younger sister to the mature, responsible mother and wife. I guess I got stuck a phase. "You'll have to tell me all about it when we get home."

"You want to come in for a cup of coffee?" I asked following social convention, though I could see she was in a hurry.

"I can't," she admitted. "Jake's cooking tonight." Ah, her lovely husband, who I happened to have briefly dated in high school. "But we should go out soon. Mommy needs some grown-up time."

She sighed and gave me a kiss on my cheek, even though she knew I hated it when she did. "How have you been? You look good."

"I'm fine."

"Charlie says you found a new therapist?" I nodded. Although Charlie's not her father, the two of them immediately bonded, so it didn't surprise me he would've told her. I was grateful, actually. Nessie grew up with our mother and her second husband, whilst I stayed with Charlie. He would have had every right not to care about her, but he still did.

"You plan on visiting this one more than once?" She skeptically raised her eyebrows at me. Damn those Dwyer-genes. I blame my mother for this.

I shrugged my shoulders, playing with one of Ellie's curls. "I might," I said honestly. To be fair, I had been thinking about it all day, while it had been a week since I last saw him. There was something about Edward Cullen that made me want to go back. This oddly was something I never had difficulty with before, I hated each and every one of my psychologists.

"Woah, he must either be real good or real hot for you to be interested in him," she teased, as I rolled my eyes at her. Although I can't deny he's damn good-looking. It still wasn't the reason I wanted to see him again. "Thank you for baby-sitting, Bells," she continued. "What do we say, Ellie?"

"Thank you, auntie Bella."

"No problem, munchkin," I replied with wide grin and gave her another kiss on her head. "Any time, Nessie."

With those words she disappeared outside. I watched for awhile while she strapped Ellie in her seat and drove off, before closing the door behind me. Immediately I let down my smile. My niece was probably the only one who could make me even remotely happy these days, yet at least Renesmee and my father thought I was doing okay. I had no desire having them check up on me again, how good their intentions might be. I also felt guilty enough that two people I love, couldn't make me feel content about my life.

After I had cleaned up the mess – who knew such a tiny human could cause it to look like a hurricane passed by? – I took an apple and my car keys, making my way outside. I didn't really know where I was going and drove around for a while, until I found myself getting closer and closer to Cullen's practice.

With a sigh I got out of my car. Stupid brain, making me go to shrinks. Was I really about to step inside a second time?

 _I can leave whenever I want_ , I told myself. No need for getting personal. I stepped inside and looked at the blonde receptionist, who remembered me from last time. Part of me wondered if she planned on tackling me to the ground this time, to prevent me from going inside unannounced.

To my surprise she simply looked confused, which quickly changed to a kind – albeit forced – smile. "Miss Swan," she said. "He's expecting a patient in 30 minutes, but he's not busy right now."

"Good," I said. It was the perfect excuse for me to get out of there fast enough. Knowing the way, I stepped towards his office, but took a deep breath. This was unfamiliar territory. Never had I chosen to go a second time, basically saying I wanted to talk. I didn't, I think. I'm not even sure anymore. I just never wanted to talk to the others, but him I wanted to tell things. _Personal things._ I had to be careful I wouldn't, not this soon.

Without knocking I made my way inside again, finding him at his desk again. Immediately he looked up and I saw a wide smile appear on his face. "You came back," he simply stated, pointing out the obvious.

"No, I just happened to find myself back here," I answered sarcastically, and sighed. "We have to have rules." That honesty for honesty-shit might've sound appealing, but I had given it enough thought to know there was a catch.

He slowly nodded. "Alright."

"A question for a question. But we have to be able to pass some of them. Otherwise the deal's off," I told him. "And I'm paying you, so you basically have to do what I tell you to do and you can't disagree with it." I took a step forward. "I'm also not promising coming back after this. This is nothing more than a trial-run."

He got this amused smirk, making me feel like I just made a damn fool of myself. "Alright," he simply repeated and got up, this time leaving the notepad behind. He seemed genuinely happy I returned, which didn't make any bloody sense.

"Alright," I mimicked and took a seat on the leather chair, closest to the window. "Let's get this over with."

* * *

 **AN: For Bella, this is a big deal.**

 **I realize this chapter doesn't contain much Edward/Bella-action, but this is something I have given some thought. The explanation is simple: Most of the actual session-parts will be from Edward's point of view, because the story revolves around him being intrigued by this woman whose behavior he can't logically explain.**

 **This doesn't mean the both of them won't be meeting outside of the _shrinking_. **

**I hope you'll enjoy this.**


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